Let’s end this failed marriage

An Open Letter to Progressives: Let’s Get a Divorce

By Washington Jefferson

I doubt that many, if any, “progressives” read Lee in the Mountains. But in case there are, I’d like to offer you a proposal. Now I know, we don’t like each other, and probably the reality is closer to hate. Nevertheless, there is no reason we’ve can’t at least be civil with one another. At least, that’s what supposedly mature adults should try to do.

Basically what I want to propose is that we Southerners and you liberals get a political divorce. By that I mean, why don’t we figure out some way top divide this country so that we don’t have to be in each other’s faces any longer? I’m not necessarily suggesting succession. When we tried that 150 years ago, you dragged us back into the Union so you could keep collecting your tariffs and other economic benefits.

No, maybe we should just go back and try what the Founding Fathers proposed: states rights and state sovereignty. That possibly could be to your liking because states rights today has no connection to slavery or racial segregation.

The way it would work is this. Each state, while remaining under federal rule, would have substantially more authority to set its social and economic agendas. Just think, you who dwell in Massachusetts and other enlightened states would be able to celebrate and practice all the activities that seem to gladden your liberal hearts-diversity, sodomy, abortion and taxation-no longer restrained by red state rednecks who try to cramp your style! You could embrace same sex marriage or even embrace your horse for all we would care.

At the same time, we Georgians and Tennesseans, etc., could go back to praising our God and oiling our guns without fear of a crackdown from one of your federal judges. In time, as people begin showing their preferences by moving, different states will become more and more liberal or conservative. And why shouldn’t you progressives like this? Here would be a true richness of diversity instead of bland national uniformity that satisfies no one. Consider also that this would give you the chance for you to practice the tolerance you always preach. We both could just live and let live without trying to impose our views on one another. What could be more tolerant than that?

Now I know what you’re going to say at this point. “We can’t let you run your own affairs. If we did that, you’d just go back to discriminating against blacks.” Ok, fair enough. We’ll make a deal with you. We’d be willing to allow most of the civil rights laws, voting rights, public accommodations, etc., to remain in effect and enforceable by the federal government.

And if you still think that blacks and other minorities would get a bad deal, they would be free to move to your liberal states where, as you would surely agree, they would certainly enjoy the far greater benefits of your public welfare and progressive thinking. Unrestrained by us, this would give you the opportunity to show the world, once and for all, how race relations should be handled.

Now I know, these are radical proposals. But haven’t you progressives always liked radicalism. And wasn’t you, after all, who pioneered the notion of no fault divorce? Let’s face it, if we stay together much longer, we’re going to come to blows-just as we did in 1861. Let’s think of the children, particularly the ones you haven’t aborted. We will fight, and they will have to fight too. For the sake of the children, let’s end this failed marriage.